Name: Jason
Q:so when i rip that lip ring out u think you'll kick myass then or after it heals... HAHA
A: Bitch please, your ass will be on the floor so fast you won't even get close to rippin' it out.

Name: Anonymous (most likely David)
Q:when were you first aware that you had become a how hag???
A: I'm not a damn howhag! You're the king of howhags. Bitch.

Name: Rob

Q: What is the meaning of our existence?

A: Well sir, I think there might be a different meaning for different peoples' existences. I exist to put smiles on peoples' faces and give cuddly puppies to all the children. Michael Jackson exists to touch little boys and wear a glove on only one hand. As for your existence, I really have no idea why you exist. Good day.



Name: Crystal

Q: Do you feel lucky punk? Well do ya?

A: Don't sass me, ok? Actually, no, I don't feel lucky. I have pretty bad luck. One time some bitch threw up on me while I was minding my own business on the train. See, no luck!



Name: Abomb is awesome

Q: I've been living in a trailor park for 16 years and I'm not quite as honkified as you...what's your secret????

A: Well, fuck white trailor trash. It's all about the urban white trash. You need to move outta your momma's trailor and move to a crappy neighborhood in Chicago and rent a shitty apartment. Then you need to go to several different public schools with no other white people. You also need to make your macaroni outta gov'ment cheese...cuz that's the best kind. Yum.



Name: Marceli

Q: What number am I thinking of?

A: A big hairy man wearing nothing but a wife beater and some tighty whities. Wait, you said number! Uh, 42.



Okay, I got these questions from tha guestbook...

Name: Jerry Mathers

Q: Why do so many young ass girls think they're bi?

A: Well I think they get that whole MTV subculture shit in their head. Guys think it's "hott" (oh yea 2 t's). So girls try to conform to it, whether they believe it or not. It's the same reason why they all wear hip hugger pants, get fake tans, wear belly rings, and wear "hottie" tshirts. It's the "cool thing" to do now. Err next time I see a flat 12 year old suburbonite white girl wearing a "hottie" tshirt, I'm gonna grab her by her stringy blonde hair and iron my clothes on her. Err ...



Name: Mishi Amoru

Q: Why are Jolly Ranchers called Jolly Ranchers?

A: Well my child, once upon a time there were ranchers. Yes, they wore big hats, pointy boots, and belt buckles. Well that's besides the point. But they were jolly. Jolly ranchers. Then they made candies and patented them, calling them Jolly Ranchers.



Name: Angie-la

Q: Why does God hate me? Is it because im black? Are you god? if so, why do you hate me?

A: As Trent Reznor says, "God is dead, and no one cares. If there is a hell, I'll see you there." So my furry lil friend, you have nothing to worry about. 'Member- tha hood got yo back.



Name: Esty

Q: When can I get my boobies hoobed?

A: Anytime you'd like, Esty ;).



Name: Nameless Faceless

Q: why did you hang up on me. why did you change your locks?

A: Damn, if I knew who you were, I could answer this one. Ahh but I didn't change my locks! All the locks are the same I tell you! Maybe you should come through my window. It's on the right side of the house, first window from the front. Yep that's right, up on Grace St. Come on down!



Name: Selena

Q: Got any tips on getting gum stains outta polyester pants? I've been trying EVERYTHING.

A: Unfortunately, I don't know much about polyester. I believe I had a pair of polyester black bellbottoms once...yes back in the day.... I got a hole in them and stopped wearing them. But back to your question, I don't know. How'd you get gum in them anyways sick freak????!!!!!! Oh yea, did you try washing them?????!



Name: Jessica

Q: Why is it that whenever I'm on a bus some guy dressed like a business man has to sit next to me and put there hand on my knee and touch my hair and ask if i wanna go back with him to his hotel room? why does every street corner downtown smell like horse pee? don't those goddamn horses clean up after themselves?

A: Well my good lady, men are pervs. Men who wear business suits that are pervs think that because they are wearing a business suit, no one will realize they are pervs. But we know. We all know. Bastards. That wasn't really your question though. I don't really know why they propostion you. Maybe they think that you don't know they're a perv because they're wearing a business suit and wanna tap dat. The general downtown area, and especially the RED LINE smells like pee. I don't know about horse pee...but general pee. Pee is pee. Horses don't have arms or fingers. I couldn't wipe my own ass w/o arms and hands and fingers. Aight I think I've spoken.....

Name: Bobo

Q: when will the porno section be up?!?!?!? if you do have one..make sure jenna jameson is on it..shes my favorite ;)

A: Oh yea, sure. Just send me all the porn on your pc, and I'll add it on my site. Wait, that might overload the space I have on my site....crap!

Name: Kittay

Q: Do i HAVE to go back to school? I didn't even pay my debt anyway.

A: Well, I wish I could tell you no. But if I have to suffer through another year, so do you. Actually, I'm sure what they'll do is not tell you until the 1st day of school. And you'll probably have to go to the office and wait around and miss your first class and they'll jerk you around then they'll tell you your classes. This is what tha Honkey has predicted.



Name: Tha ORIGINAL HONKEY (me!!!!!!)

Q: Hmmm...why are there 2 pop punk bands playing with Acumen Nation Sunday?

A: Well, I really don't know the answer to this one, seeing as I ASKED IT!!!!!!



Name: Chedda

Q: Do you (got any questions)

A: Yea, I just asked one above this one. So if you'd like to answer it, holla back youngin'...



Name: Coco Bunnie?

Q: Can we get naked?

A: Sure, and let's join a nudist colony....or not...I hear it's a bunch of grotesque old people..ewww...



Name: CRAZY KEN!

Q: How did you get so hot??

How did I find this place?? Where do I get back on the highway??? Can I borrow a dollar for gas??? Really??

A: I'm not! Well I think you watched too much Lost Highway. Well to get back on that highway you go 'bout 12 miles yonder! Sure you cna borrow a dollar, as long as you pay it back -- with interest! Mwahahah! Yes, really! Thilly thauthage boy!



Name: Mesha n Nelly n' Bobby

Q: 1.Mesha wants to know will Dani get some today????

2.Bobbie wants to know why his middle finger is crooked?

3. Dani wants to know why Mesha is such a bitch?

4. Question from all will you join us Honkey?

A: Dani get some what? Pokes from Martin, yet. But not THOSE kind of pokes ;). SOrry dani! Well, Bobbie's middle finger is crooked cuz it got lost in Mesha's cooch once. I know all. Mesha is a bitch cuz shes a freakin' rican. Will I join you all? In a lighthearted game of bidmiton, yes!



Name: Junior AKA Ron (The Papi Chulo is back for more!)

Q: zasto japanac nosi kofer?

A: Ummm.....blow me.....?



Name: Mah Cuzin Erin

Q: Does your brother even brush his teeth?

A: Only when my mom makes him. Thanks for the account of what happened. I would've had a field day had I been there. Well there's next time. He's a real lady killer, huh? Hahahahaha...yes...I reckon I'll be seeing you soon!



Name: Ashes!!!!!!

Q: yeah i actually do. do you ever wonder why there are random ppl smokin pot at the festivals of chicago and the cops walkin around dont give two shits about it? i always thought it was part of the fun...until i landed my ass in jail.

A: "It's been 6 months, pick me up from the county jail." I have no idea, its those hippies. There was some hippie concert yesterday at the Chicago Theater or whatever its called, ya know by Gallery 37. On another note, I can't wait to see the outcome of tomorrow's 8th period Trig class. "I hate this stupid class blah blah blah!" Hahahaha dumb bitch... Goodtimes.

Name: Mesha n Nelly

Q: we need u 2 anser somw ?'s 4 photo class 1st what is appropriate on the CTA

2nd. Is it okay for Mesha to make out with her man R**?

3rd. Should Kastle have Vinnie?

4th. Do you ever get stared at on the bus?

5th. IF you have reacted, how did you do so?

A: Hmmm.....yeah you guys are pretty nosey. Well, wtf are you asking me about Mesha for? She already did.. I think it was wet. Yes, anyone who is Polish, Kastle had dibs on, period! Yes, I have many a time. I either stared back, made dirty looks, and said shit out loud. One time, the windows were fogged up so I wrote "I'm going to kill you" on it, and the guy stopped staring. You guys are weird. [Or not!] Yeah bitch I live at 5**8 W. Grace and what? Yeah I'd like to see ya'll come up in hea! B!



Name: Junior (Ron)

Q: Why do they call Apple Jacks apple if they don't like apple?

A: Well Papi Chulo, its this simple: People like apples and cereal-making capatalist pigs like money. Apple taste = ALMIGHTY $. But, it doesn't taste much like apples, but they don't have to eat it, they get gourmet breakfast w/ their big fat paychecks, cuz they sell cereal for liek $5 a box. How the hell can I afford that w/ food stamps! Wooo!



Name: Gatita (Kittay)

Q: Do you have R. Kelly's numba...I'm a big fan....

A: Yes, infact I do, (773)-HOL-LAH1....holla back YOUNGIN'



Name: Kitty

Q: Do you like Peach cobbler?

A: Yeah I do. But not as much as I enjoy ICE CREAM SANDWICHES

and OREOS. hahahahahha



Name: J Money (Justin)

Q: Is Martin's sister hot? Why aren't there more pics?

A: I really don't know. Just imagine Martin, with a smaller, girlier figure, and longer hair. Actually I have seen her a few times, but I didn't look at her closely. Well there aren't more pics becuase Jenny's polish scanner broke, and they're all at her house. So, yell at her.



Name: Wayne W.

Q: When your feet sleep do they dream?

A: Mine dream about peppermint kisses!

Q: Do chickens burp?

A: I believe all animals pass gas.....



Name:Inette

Q: Do you love me?

A: Of course I do!



Name: John

Q: yah...so its 100 bucks an hour for weekdays but 250 an hour at night? wtf is that all about?

A: You are a drunken fool, boy.



Name: Ray

Q: How the hell did you make such a shitty ass website?

A: It was simple, i signed on to Tripod and added random pages of crap...



Name: Applesauce Mcgee

Q: Is there any truth to Superman being gay?

A: I heard he was with your brother the other night...



Name: Jesus

Q: Why can't I find any hot chicks?

A: Well you wear a white robe and Nikes. You also carry around a big wooden cross, what the hell do you expect?!



Name: The ugly dude (he's not really ugly)

Q: Can someone get this kid a happy meal?

A: Tell that kid he can walk his lazy ass over to McDonalds.....there's one every 4 blocks...



Name: Sean

Q:

Is flirting a necessary part of the dating expirnece? Why can't people just walk up to each other with signs on their foreheads saying, "I want you" or "I want you to want me" or "Jump me now"?



A: I agree with you. I really don;t know.....humans are stupid...



Name: George



Q: Why aren't you fucking me yet?



A: You never asked dude.







Name: Martin



Q: Why is Megan's butt so big? (this is really a FAQ)



A: I actually don't know, I think it's all the ice cream I eat, and it runs in my family.







Name: Jenny



Q: Do you smell like kids?



A: Actually I smell like Identity's Ocean Breeze (yeah I finally got the good shower gel and perfume).



Name: Jeff D.



Q: Wanna fuck?



A: Yes, actually i do.







NAme: Andrea



Q: Will you marry me?



A: Yes, but only in a state that allows same sex marriages.







Name: Philski



Q: Why is the Intarweb so slow?



A: I dunno, I'm not much w/ the computers!







Name: Angie~la



Q: Why haven't you signed my guestbook yet?



A: I didn't know you had one, but now that I do I must sign.......



Name: Alex G.



Q: Why is it red?



A: Well if you are referring to my site good man, I like red, and I like the template.



Name: David (Muffin Man!)



Q:How many licks does it take to get the center of a tootsie roll pop? seriusoly megan how many?



A: Well, if my calculations are correct, it would be 362 licks.



Name: Jessenia



Q: Can me and Tina wear ur bra on our heads again?!



A: No, damn you!



Name: Devil (James)



Q: Who grabbed my ass? Why is the earth round like that?



A: I think it was R. Kelly. Because it's not flat.



Name: Tony



Q: do u like paper and if so wat kind and wat form of paper?



A: I prefer college rule, wide rule really bugs me!



Name: Homo Joe (most likely Angie~la)



Q: where is my tequila? and why isnt megan in my pants yet? and whatever happened to that flower that grew on joes ass?



A: I think Jess drank your tequila. Well I can't enter someone's pants w/o a formal invitation dammit! I think he put it in a vase!



Name: jeff



Q: Will anyone suck me off?



A: Any thing for you, remember?



Name: Tony



Q: Do you know where the bathroom is?



A: Just use the alley man!



Name: Kastle



Q: Where did that vendor come from?



A: I believe it was from the kitchen of Margie's ( on western n amitage)







Name: Dani ( I know you are not the Chinese lady at the buffet you wonton!)



Q: Why does Megan hate Dani so much?



A: Because of that damn sweaty pillow fight!







Name: Nick



Q: Why can't MArk Deran die and go to hell?



A: 1. I don't know who he is. 2. I don't know if hell exists. 3. Just kill the bastard (if applicable)







Name: Jeff



Q; Does anyone remember never?



A: I remember the time in Algebra today when I kept telling Mr. Horcsh about the huge hole in the back of my pants, and he kept telling me he didn't wanna hear about it.



Name: Kittay!

Q: Where it be at?

A: Most likely at yo crib, depite us breaking your wicker couch, messing up your mom's room, and where's waldo bothering us! BEEYATCH! ya bastard!



Name: Ozmium (Scott)

Q: why is the insane clown posse better the manson.

and why are those playa hataz holding down us white folk?

A: Get it staight biotch, Manson kicks ICP's ass! Well son, once you got white you knows you 'aight! There's just too much flava in my pale skin!



Name: Moe

Q: Is Bloody Mary real?

A: Well if you consider the hype that hangs by Clark n Division bloody, then yes.



Name: Lunette the CLown (most likely Dani or Kastle)

Q: Why does Megan sell herself to Drunken penguins?

A: Who said I charged them money? Who said they were drunk? And more importantly who said they were penguins?!



Name: Yes (most likely Martin)

Q: Update where?

A: Here it is, so shove it sideways up your ass!



Name: Tinka

Q: Who farted?

A: Well since I'm not there w/ you now, and I don't know who you're with, my best guess is CBG (crazy bitch granma)!



Name:Charles (Mr. Jigglesworth)

Q: I wonder what Buttman is doing now?

A: Mr. Jigglay, its not a matter of what he's doing, but who he's doing....and we already know where, when and how. YEAH, BITCH!



Name: Yo Mama (obviously Kastle)

Q: Where are my mexispexs (you mean mexispex)? And can you pass me the damn suga- I mean flour?

A: Well, I haven't quite made all my ethnic products......ya know you just inspired me to add another useless page to this site.... I should put some of my ideas for my ethnic products plus rough sketches....yeS! Well you'll get them when i make them, B. Yeah next time we make cookies, lets make sure we knwo the difference between flour and sugar!



Name: Kittysan

Q: Can you guess who I saw at Jewel?

A: Ohh was it Mr. Bojangles?



Name: Remy X

Q:



Is Killing Clones Legal?

What if it was a Clone of GW Bush?

is the mind a spiritual entity?

is the body a physical entity?

does the mind and body interact?

does physical and spiritual entities interact?

are you drunk?

do you think im drunk?

A: Wow, you're a curious one. By the way thanks for the links, i do enjoy nocturne...but I missed their show last month cuz it was 21 and over :(. Well sir, I'm guessing killing clones would be illegal cuz you wouldnt be sure who the original person is. Well lets just kill the real GB, giddy up! All the other stuff you asked I'm not sure about. No, actually I'm straight edge. Nah I don't think you're drunk. Just special...:) Yeee hawwww!



Name: Twiggy

Q: Why am I here?

A: If you are refering to my site, prolly cuz you clicked my link, cuz I am a shameless self-promoter. If you are refering to life/being on the earth, it's because 2 ppl had sex, and you busted outta yo momma's hoo haa. And now you are here.



Name: Santa (moe)

Q:What do you want for Christmas?

A: A trampoline.



Name: Ian

Q: yeah, why IS megan's ass so fuckin big?!

A: I don't really know....runs in the family...too much ice cream...ehh...



Name: Mesha

Q: Do 12 year olds get laid on their birthdays?

A: Depends on what hood they be from and who they peeps is. Seriously, I hope 12 year olds don't get laid on their birthdays, but 13 year olds on the other hand......



Name: Dani

Q: When the hell you going to get more pics????

A: Actually I gave Jenny some pics a few days ago, and I'm waiting for her to scan and send them to me!



Name: jhds (i actually have no idea who this is)

Q: Why does Emily have to be such a bitch?

A: Well, I don't know who Emily is, so I'm not sure. It also could be somthing you did to her. But I don't know the situation between you and her, you'd haveto fill me in w/ some more info before I can give you a better answer. Or she could just be on her period.



Name: Todd (dani is more disturbed than i am)

Q: Why is megan just sooooo sexy? why does she have such big boobs? and why do the breats and ass not help in her very entertaining fights with lanky? beat that cracka's ass already!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

A: I'm not really sexy I swear. My boobs aren't that big. I just don't know! He's so damn boney ! Its hard to flob him upside the head with my boob, I'm sorry! I'll try to beat his ass next time!